On this Date in 1590...

...John White, governor of the Roanoke Colony, returned from England only to find the settlement deserted.  Marking the worst coming home party in history.

On this Date in 1586...

...Mary, Queen of Scots, recognizes Philip II of Spain as her heir and successor.  Her official statement was, "Hey look, it's Philip II of Spain, my heir and successor."

On this Date in 1215...

...King John of England puts his seal to the Magna Carta.  Though why he allowed an aquatic animal to lie upon such an important document is still a mystery.

On this Date in 1842...

...John Francis attempts to murder Queen Victoria as she drives down Constitution Hill, London with Prince Albert.  The attempt was thwarted, however, as they were both riding in a can, which was impervious to attack.

On this Date in 1503...

...James IV of Scotland and Margaret Tudor are married according to a Papal Bull by Pope Alexander VI. A Treaty of Everlasting Peace between Scotland and England signed on that occasion results in a peace that lasts ten years.  Thus proving once and for all that "forever" is officially equal to 10 years.

On this Date in 1689...

...The English Parliament passes the Act of Toleration protecting Protestants. Roman Catholics are intentionally excluded.  It was extremely important to make this distinction since Protestants and Roman Catholics were always being confused for each other.

On this Date in 1429...

...Joan of Arc ends the Siege of Orléans, pulling an arrow from her own shoulder and returning, wounded, to lead the final charge. The victory marks a turning point in the Hundred Years' War.  The English returned home in shame as news spread about how they were "beaten by a girl."

On this Date in 1640...

...King Charles I of England dissolves the Short Parliament.  It didn't take very long, since it wasn't very long.

On this Date in 1493...

...Pope Alexander VI divides the New World between Spain and Portugal along the Line of Demarcation.  France and England look on in amusement.

On this Date in 1194...

...King Richard I of England gives Portsmouth its first Royal Charter.  Though there are many that are still waiting for the bus.

On this Date in 1942...

...World War II: In retaliation for the Royal Air Force bombing of Lübeck several weeks prior, the Luftwaffe began a series of bombing raids in England, starting with Exeter.  Though, it appeared as though they would be going way over budget on the operation since someone in the planning committee accidentally chose the small town in California instead of the one in England.

On this Date in 1850...

...The Great Fire of Cottenham, a large part of the Cambridgeshire village (England) is burnt to the ground under suspicious circumstances.  Chicago mentions that maybe they should check out the cows of a certain Irish woman, who have been known to start such things.

On this Date in 1560...

...the Treaty of Berwick, which would expel the French from Scotland, is signed by England and the Congregation of Scotland.  Apparently, even the Scots couldn't stand the smell of the French.  And that's saying something.